A Eulogy for the iPod

Today, I am here to celebrate the life, and death, of the 4GB iPod Mini. For years, you have brought me much happiness, playing music for me to help me get through my days of working in the Office of Admissions. I listened to you for hours, telling people to “Move, Get Out the Way”, just like Ludacris, as well as wishing them to “Be Blessed”, the way that only the likes of Yolanda Adams can do. You brought me joy, like Anita Baker (even though I don’t have that one downloaded yet, so I need to get it), and made me think of Piña Coladas. Yes, my mini, I will surely miss you. Although I will, in no way, miss how you would so many times cut off, for no reason, while I was in the middle of singing a song. No, I will not miss the countless hours of you being in a “frozen” state. And no means of being fixed. No, I will not miss that at all. Especially since that one day I get to work, and you’re completely empty. Yes, that day made me realize that it was time for you to go. Erase my damn songs off of you without any explanation! Stinky iPod Mini.



That’s why, although I am sad to see you go, I will welcome in your replacement: The iPod Touch! Yes, now I can feel mad with Ne-Yo, have it all with The Jets, just feel so much better now. And Now my days at work will go by quicker. And Peanut can enjoy her baby jams, or at least the tracks I have picked out to play while she gets to sit back in her little water world.

Now despite the fact that you messed up a bit, again, I will be sad to see you go. You leave behind the songs that you did house for me for these last few years (although a lot of the ones that I did have on you are no where to be found, thank you very much). No matter…I will begin a new life with my iPod Touch and be happy. Thank you for your service, Mini. There will not be a burial, nor will there be a stomping of the Mini in the front yard to symbolize my anger of missing a few hours of songs. No, that would not be a good thing. No, you will be put into the electronics graveyard with all of my other products that suddenly died…with the exception of the wireless mouse that exploded in my hand. That was thrown away with the quickness. R.I.P., Mini.

P.S.
We will FINALLY find out for sure that Peanut is a girl or boy, although I know in my heart of hearts she's a girl, dag nabit!